Suffocating

Zoe curled in close to Jim. She had this way of contorting her body so it appeared they were one person. He used to enjoy it, but now it stank of desperation.  Her head was buried in his neck, so she couldn’t see the look of disgust on his face.

Jim had a list of things he still needed to do, and it was already late afternoon. As much as he understood they might need moments like this to rebuild what they had, it felt like these moments had been happening all too often over the past two years.

Zoe had this need to lie around and feel his touch to feel secure. It had been all right at first, but it had begun to infringe on the accomplishment of household tasks and then bigger goals. He’d already lain with her for an extra half hour this morning.

In their current entanglement, Jim’s arms were pinned to his sides, and Zoe’s slight frame sat heavy on his chest and stomach, making each breath a strain. He squirmed as it became harder to breathe. Zoe tightened her hold.

Panic came into his mind, coupled with his frustration at not being able to get to his remaining chores. His breathing was short and desperate. He thought to throw Zoe off, but knew that wasn’t the answer. He didn’t want to upset her.

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

“Nothing.”

“No, I can tell something is wrong with you. Tell me.”

“No, don’t worry about it,” he gasped.

“Jim, you have to talk to me. We’ve talked about how we need to improve our communication. I don’t want to sound harsh, but we both know you’re the one with the most work to do. You know you can tell me anything, right?”

“You’re suffocating me.”